I can't do it, anymore. I can't look up at a black sky without feeling my stomach clench, like a fist has just been buried in it. I can't see lightning flash past the trees without dropping everything and making sure everyone is inside, and safe. When the storm is rolling through, I can't stay away from the window, always watching, watching for...what? I don't even like to say it. That's how bad it is. Ever since the storm in Tennessee.
Fear...makes me angry. Also, people who aren't aware of how easy it is to get hurt, to die. Who don't take precautions of any sort. I told them, Mother Nature is a b****. You do not mess with Mother Nature.
So I don't know what to do now. If you're afraid, you're supposed to face your fear and conquer it. But I don't know how to face this--because it's rooted in truth. And I'm not about to stand out in the field in a lightening storm singing, "I'm a little lightning rod for Jesus," like I used to as a kid. (A very little kid.)
Blehg. This is getting nowhere. Maybe I will go sing in the next storm.
2 comments:
hmm. I don't take precautions for storms and stuff, but it's not because I don't realize the danger. It's that I don't care. Death doesn't scare me.
Sadly, this means I don't know how to conquer it. Sorry.
I don't know; Jesus felt fear, and He wielded it. You can't change how you feel, but you can choose how you use that feeling. It isn't much, but it helps me.
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