Dr. Nyirady came to do pre-application interviews yesterday, and I showed up in my customarily dark dressy attire, hands cold and hair messily curled, because that's how I roll when I'm nervous.
But, while he was an interesting, genial gentleman and in no way intimidating, I still left the short meeting mentally drained and deeply disappointed in myself. And I'm tired of being disappointed.
Loma Linda's list of requirements is set rather...high. And while I mostly fall within the parameters, due to my two bad semesters of mostly B's I'm in Loma Linda's "grey area" of acceptance. What can save me is my continuing "upward trajectory;" aka nearly straight A's for the rest of my time here.
Oh, geesh. There goes my life.
But I hate how it seems like my whole college career has been a painful balancing act between falling just short of the elusive A and still being out and moving and alive, living, and yet being guilty; because if I studied all the time, I could indeed get A's. But if I'm not supposed to be out and getting to know people, making connections, then why are my parents paying skads of money for me to be here?
Is being a surgeon worth this? I have to believe so...
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